Early Teen
Age 13-15 years
Parenting an early teen is a lot like parenting a toddler in some ways. The developmental stage is all about moving toward independence, not always gracefully or responsibly.
We can't change our child's basic personality, and the outside environment has a profound effect, from peers to school to media. But how we parent makes the critical difference in how our teen acts, from how rebellious he is to whether she throws emotional tantrums, from whether he gets enough sleep to how studious she is.
If we can manage our own emotions, extend respect, offer appropriate freedom, and maintain intimacy and communication -- a tall order for most parents -- we can be pleasantly surprised by how rewarding the teen years can be. The rewards are huge, as we watch our child transform and blossom in front of our eyes.
Start Here:
Game Plan for Peaceful Parenting Your Early Teen
Good relationships between teens and their parents are positively correlated with school success and general happiness. Here's 10 tips for staying positively connected with your teen.
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Navigate Your Teen’s Emerging Independence
If we've accepted our child's dependency needs AND affirmed her development into her own person, she'll stay fiercely connected to us even as her focus shifts.
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Setting Limits with Teens and Preteens
Parenting teens and preteens can be aggravating. Here's how to support them to meet your expectations, while also strengthening your relationship.
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Beyond Discipline for Teens
Discipline as we usually think of it backfires with teens. If you come down like a sledge hammer, you can count on open rebellion. Here's what to do instead.
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Want a Trustworthy 14 Year Old?
Dr. Laura's personal Aha! parenting moment with her 14 year old daughter. Here's what happened...
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Folks, she's brilliant. It's wonderful to have parenting experts who don't see the child as the enemy in a locked combat, for one thing. I recommend it.
"Your emails are life savers! So well thought-out and written!" - Helene Brazier-Mitouart
"I'd really recommend Laura Markham's Aha! parenting books and website for brilliantly practical ways to parent with kindness instead of punishment." - Makchoon
Makchoon
I have seen amazing improvement in my *very* angry 17 year-old son after acknowledging that there was a reason he was so angry and acting out. We have had several heartfelt conversations and I have seen a real change in how he treats his younger brother, and how he treats me.
I know that I am a better parent thanks to Dr. Laura's inspirational words and suggestions.
My daughter reacts so much better when I empathize and stay patient. And now I get to model that behavior instead of letting my frustration get the better of me.
"Another brilliant article, pulling compelling information together in a readable way. Thank you so much for the work you do. You help me as a parent of teenagers, and I pass your articles on to clients." - Nancy Eisenberg
Thank you so much for this great advice! You give me ideas for how I can "do it better" and that lifts me up with hope and positivity too!
"I just want to say that the advice about dealing with toddlers on this website is excellent. It is amazing how much my attitude changes my son's behavior. If I make an effort to empathize with him, he is so much more cooperative. It does take an effort -- after all, I have a lot to do and I don't always want to take the time. But I find it is worth it to avoid the tantrums and fussing. He is much better behaved now, and other people even comment on it."
Jennifer
Today I say thank you, tears streaming from my face, so proud of my little boy and all he will become. Thank you. - Jennifer B.
Jennifer B
Your philosophies are the only tools we've come across which offer practical advice grounded in clearly laid out lay terminology. Our family life day-to-day is nothing short of a miracle, thanks to you! - Dana Questad
Dana Questad
